Twin Flame
Dress shopping with my high school friend for her wedding. Lunch with some of the bridesmaids at a super trendy, border line hippy restaurant. Yapping about fond and not-so-fond high school memories. Boom, I’m crying. The topic: high school best friends. One of the bridesmaids brought up mine and she immediately described what our relationship looked like from the outside: TWIN FLAMES.
After my parents’ divorced after my freshman year of highschool, my mother moved my brother and I to another city about 30 minutes away. It was totally different with it’s brand new neighborhoods and newly developed shopping centers. It felt and looked nothing like my hometown. I had about a month to get used to it and get geared up for a new high school. Here I was, thinking I had totally mastered freshman year with my quirky friends from middle school. All of us traveling in packs to ensure none of us experienced any embarrassing moments without a posse to turn to at any moment. We were definitely ready for sophomore year. All of this came to a halt as I was on my own to navigate a new campus, 100% new. My new school had just been built and the halls were about to be graced for the first time with a special collection of kids from the surrounding cities. I was overwhelmed.
Initially, I made several friends. Honestly, by default all of the black kids kind of just gathered together. We sorted out if we like each other afterwards. About a couple months in, I had a group of close friends and even wrangled up a boyfriend. I had all of my bases covered. Well, I thought. During that year, I met a girl who would become my very best friend. And now at 25, I know she was my twin flame. I was calm and very earthy, nothing really excited me. She was excited and always in the clouds, she could be moved by anything. When we met, I remember being startled by her presence and most of all how others reacted to her energy. In teenage terms, she was weird. Through joining the track team (and equally sucking), we became really close. And she soon became my person. We even looked alike: very tall, brown skinned, long hair & shapely.
Our bond was pretty instantaneous, almost as if it was destined. Before I knew it we were passing notes in class and the hallways, we had inside jokes for days, and even had our own little language. It was crazy but I loved it.
After hearing the term “Twin Flame”, I did my research to see if it even applied to my friendship with her. I read tons of articles and watched a few videos. Things that rang true:
Different but the same: As different as she and I were, we had many fundamental things in common.
Desires/Fears: She never made me feel comfortable, not in a weird way. But I was always on my toes. It’s what drove me crazy about her seeing as I’m more based on logic and for her, things could be so whimsical. It’s what I desired most but also feared.
Consistency: For some reason we couldn’t remain consistent. According to the twin flame logic our connection was too intense. Intense it was as our friendship didn’t have a balance. Either she was leaning completely on me or I on her.
Our friendship dwindled down about 3 years ago and we’ve lost contact since. It is on my resolution to connect with her this year. Fingers crossed!
Have a twin flame? I want to hear all about it. xoxo
